I have bad timing

Michael has been so hard on himself the past couple of weeks. Everything around him seems to be bitter. Many friends of his are sad, one of his friends is ill in hospital, and he has a girlfriend that continues to disapoint him. I’ve been trying all week to make him feel better. I can’t understand him sometimes. The figure of what i see to be immaculate, every little detail of perfection to me, thinks so poorly of himself :( he pushes himself too much, and i wish i could stop him, and that he understood to only accept the best of himself, because that’s all he can ask for. He is the best person in my life, and i would give anything, break an arm, to get those lips to curl into a smile. 

"If I had the time, I’d stop the world and make you mine. And everyday would stay the same with you"

Sometimes in my room, I find lingering remains of your scent. It makes me feel home, yet somehow only reminds me of your absence. And how much I miss, and long to be with you.  

I’ve never experianced death before. And now that it is so near i cannot bring myself to say the things i usually would. May you get better Sandra, you are a beautiful mother and a beautiful friend to us all. I love you.

I want you to sit by my bed every single day when I’m dying, and convince me not too. But when I do, I want you to know that I can forever protect and guide you, and never stop loving you. That way, my love for you will be until the rest of eternity, and your love for me will turn to shade, and you will inevitably learn to love somebody else. I will always love you.